America's leading INDEPENDENT adult humor network/content provider
Dan Sroka Presents Digital Diarrhea Volume #12
Resources from the Dan Sroka Humor Network
Network Portal | Free Email | Video | Podcast | Affiliate Program | Search | Fan Club | Blog | Survey
Sexy Trinity Waiting To Give You a Real
Workout!
Digital Diarrhea News Service (DDNS) has learned of an unbelievable
opportunity for any red blooded man! Three sexy and willing babes are
ready to give you a workout like you’ve never had in your life.
Any readers who are familiar with Digital Diarrhea, Unpublished Proceedings, World Famous Calendars and Short Stories, Berserk Briefs or satire-by-sroka are already familiar with these luscious babes. These girls can and will rock your fucking world. They’ve teamed up in a business partnership, sponsored by sexist media mogul Baluga H Cornhole, to
give you what you really want. Just think- 3 sexy babes pounding you
all night long!
The girls are hot to get their hands on you.
Frauline Fellatio Freda whispered in our reporters’ ear “I
want to do it to you all night long and then give you a workout live on
the internet. Just you, me and my two friends.” Senorita Stimclit, the
youngest of the “Sex Queens”, as they have come to be
known, told our reporter “I like the rough stuff and I hope you can dish it out, and take it too. I’m gonna give it to you like
you’ve never had it. When I’m personally done with you
you’ll be in the ICU- and I guarantee that! The third Sex Queen
likewise had a message for our DDNS reporter. We can’t repeat verbatim exactly what Ice
Princess said here, but just rest assured that she indicated she had
a big surprise for anyone requesting the services of the Sex
Queens.
Now, I know the men out there are salivating like Homer Simpson with some chocolate ice cream, and I know your peckers are getting wet just thinking
about the possibilities. But, for the moment, just keep your hands away
from your slimy stinking doink. There is a small catch to this Sexy
workout thing. First off, we are not going to tell you exactly what these
babes are going to do to you. Let’s just say it’s like nothing
you’ve ever participated in before, even when you were in the Holiday
Inn. (Take that for what it’s worth.) Above and beyond all of that,
remember that Baluga H Cornhole is the sponsor of all of this. We have reviewed the fine print in the Sex Queens Workout Agreement Form that you
must sign. It has some very questionable clauses in the contract. One of
them has to do with you spending several hours in a motel room with Mr. Cornhole prior to
hooking up with the Sex Queens for your workout. A word to the wise is
sufficient. Don’t eat a big meal before going in there with Mr.
Cornhole.
Another questionable issue has already been alluded to. This workout, be
it Cornhole segment or the Sex Queen trinity action, is all broadcast live
on the www. So, not only will you be receiving a couple real physical
workouts, but the whole world will be watching all of this live. Some of
you exhibitionists might enjoy that part of it. Be forewarned however,
some of this might be stuff you wouldn’t want your wife, girlfriend,
kids or mother to see. So, if you are going to partake of this exciting
offer, be sure to go incognito with a ZZ Top outfit on, or at least a fake
mustache or shaved head.
I know some of you out there like to live dangerously, and you die hards are probably still with us, and still interested. So, the next logical question is what does it all cost? You’ll have to pay a hefty price
to get this service. Depending on your age, size and physical agility-
you’ll pay between $1500 and $3000. Plus you have to pay for the
rental of the facilities, transportation to and from the Sex Queen workout
center, the hotel room, all medical equipment and sex toys utilized (you
get to keep the sex toys after they have been used), the fees and services
related to the live internet broadcast and other incidental charges. This
all could easily add another $1500 tab. Plus, it’s mandatory for you
to buy a life insurance policy, payable to Baluga H Cornhole directly, in the amount of $100,000. That will rip you for another $200. So, if you are
still interested in hooking up with these babes, for a workout you
truly will never forget, you may apply herein. Just fill out the
application form below and you will be notified of your acceptance into
the Sex Queen Workout Program. You will be subsequently notified of the
membership criterion, payment schedule, date of your workout and all the
legal mumbo-jumbo, etc.
Disclaimer: The Digital Diarrhea News Service or any
of it’s affiliates, including Dan Sroka’s Humor Network, Unpublished Proceedings, World Famous Calendars and Short Stories, Berserk Briefs and satire-by-sroka do not endorse or support the service herein.
Our purpose is to report/announce this story as a Public Service to
those individuals who might have an interest or need for it. We want to
make it especially clear that we are in no way associated with Baluga H
Cornhole or his Sex Queen Workout Service. Furthermore, if any of us has
had any relations with any of the three babes- Stimclit, Freda or Ice
Princess, any of us would deny it to the bitter end.
Copyright © Dan Sroka, 11/6/99, 
4/08
Digital Diarrhea is a division of the Dan Sroka Humor Network. If you would like to be notified whenever new writings are added to any of these sites send a BLANK email message to this address:
satire-by-sroka-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Network Endorsements and Shopping. The Dan Sroka Humor Network is a totally free, non-revenue producing entity. Please patronize and shop with our partners and help keep America's Leading INDEPENDENT Adult Humor Network free
Endorsements/Shopping
