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Dan Sroka Presents Digital Diarrhea Volume #8

Texas Fatboy Snaps- Kills 32

Houston, Texas (DDNS) Another tragic murder rampage. Becoming common place anymore. John WET DANK Sanchez, a 300 lb. human waste, sometimes garbage man, sometimes pseudo-professional real estate agent, went berserk and killed over 30 people, injured 25 more. Ho-hum..what else is new?

John WET DANK Sanchez was a bomb waiting to explode. The product of a one night stand, from his illegitimate birth 25 years earlier, to his constant abuse of various forms of dope, he was a complete and utter failure. It all caught up with the slobbish Texas fatboy drug addict.

Fatboy Sanchez reportedly smoked up a kilo of wet dank on Thursday night, after he’d fucked up yet another multi-million dollar commercial real estate deal in Harris County. His bungling caused a major manufacturing firm to go bankrupt. This is not the first time Sanchez has been involved in such catastrophes. His incompetence and drug abuse reeked havoc on this city and county many times previously. The incompetent bucket of cholesterol/fat has had a horrendous track record.

Bombed out of his fat fucking ugly ass, the 300 lb. dope head next secured an arsenal of military killing weapons. John WET DANK Sanchez purchased 5 assault pistols, 3 high powered killer rifles and a surplus bazooka at the Union Juarez Department Store at 59/Greenway. Sanchez procured this killer cache without so much as a background check. In fact he did not even pay for the weapons. He charged them to the account of his employer- Dingleberry Real Estate Services of Bellaire. From there, the monster proceeded to said real estate firm for what was to become the nations worst mass-killing spree.

The human pig entered the facility with the assault pistols under his oversized suit, carrying the 3 rifles, blatantly exposed. No one challenged the walking doper/murderer. The guard on duty at the office complex even offered him a hit of his bag of glue as he (Sanchez) entered. The guard reportedly told fatboy Sanchez “nice murder rifles you have there. You know what I mean, man” as John WET DANK Sanchez took several deep whiffs from the guards brown bag.

From there the human waste sleeze bucket went to the third floor and began shooting. With a rifle in each hand John WET DANK Sanchez began his killing rampage. He unloaded the 2 rifles and began with the third rifle and the assault pistols.

He killed virtually all of his peers, which he blamed for his most recent real estate fuck up. Then the dope head moved to the adjacent office of the Texas Bureau of Free Guns for Everyone and continued his massacre there. In all John WET DANK Sanchez killed 32 innocent people and injured 25. 13 of those are in critical condition with injuries inflicted by this incompetent fuck off.

The ordeal was ended when a 79 year old geezer, Juanita Chingatta shot and killed John WET DANK Sanchez in an adjacent office. Chingatta, equipped with her own assault pistol, was at the Texas Welfare Department, signing up for her weekly $500 stipend, when Sanchez crossed her path. “No one fucks with my benefits” explained the unemployed retired freeloader. “I’ll fuck you up, next- so get away from me”. Chingatta shot John WET DANK Sanchez right between the eyes. He died instantly. Juanita Chingatta collected her $500 check and left the building, headed for the Bellfort St. Liquor-rama.

In the end, for perhaps the first time in history, John WET DANK Sanchez will do some good for others. The tragic irony of it is that in death he will help others. His 300 lb. carcass will be ground up into dog food to be fed to the vicious pit-bulls that regularly assault illegal immigrants around the Bellfort St. Liquor-rama.

If you want to help the surviving family members of those killed in this senseless murder rampage, send your cash or money order to the Texas Bureau of Free Guns for Everyone, 2007 Southwest Freeway, Houston, Texas. Donations of more than $1,000 will get you a free high powered killer assault pistol sent directly to your home- no strings attached.

4/08

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