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Lose Weight Fast
Calling all behemoths, lardos and overweight human blimps. Tired of trying endlessly to lose that extra 100 pounds youve put on? Are you disgusted with your lack of will power? Tired of eating until your jaws cant move anymore? Are you tired of buying new clothing every week cause your old stuff no longer fits. Are you fed up with converting old army tents into clothing that will fit you- for a week or two?
Good! Cause we have the solution for you overweight living washing machines. Our new product, developed by a famous scientist in his basement laboratory over in Antwerp, Belgium, has taken Europe by a storm. Thousands of overweight heifers have lost millions of pounds with this product. And, best of all, its painless, quick, and cheap!
Our new miracle formula will eat your fat away like terminal cancer eats away a dying mans life! For, you see, our new miracle formula IS cancer.... its living trichinosis (trichinella spiralis) for you more educated types. For most of you imbeciles- that means living worms.
All you fat lardos do is get a bucket full of these worms and eat a couple hand fulls every day until youve cleaned out the complete batch. Yeah, they swirl around in your mouth and going down your throat, but once in your big gut you wont feel them anymore. But, thats where the magic begins. You see these cancer filled maggots start gnawing away at your big ass internally. They literally eat you up from inside. Everything. Fat, blubber, lard, bones, organs- everything.
Believe us- you WILL lose weight- and fast. We guarantee it! If you dont lose at least 50 pounds on your first bucket, we will send you TWO free buckets of trichinosis worms at no cost whatsoever. Umm, and they are so delicious, youll want to order an extra bucket right now.
Hurry- the supply is limited. Over a million buckets have been consumed in Europe. But, if you order now, you wont pay the high European price for these miracle fat eating worms. What sells for $240 a bucket in Europe, is yours now, through our special purchase offer, for only $179 a bucket. And, we give you free shipping- a $40 value.
Your bucket of worms will be shipped fresh from the Antwerp laboratory production farm direct to your house or barn and within days youll be losing more weight than you can imagine!
Theyll be calling you slim-Jim instead of Lardbucket, Fatty or Baluga whale. Dont wait- order now! Wire your non-refundable electronic cash transfer for the amount of $179 US to- killerdildo@safe-mail.net along with your name, address, weight and age.
Copyright © Dan Sroka, 9/25/00,
3/08
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