Terrorist Kills World's Tallest Woman

Gibby Gilligan, the tallest human to ever live, was killed last night in a car bombing outside Madison Sq. Garden. The 24 year old 9 foot tall athlete, professional wrestler and reputed lesbo/gaygirl was killed instantly when she turned the ignition on her vehicle and it immediately exploded. NYC cops speculated this was a terrorist car bombing and subsequently apprehended a known terrorist who recently arrived in New York City- Vladimirivov Lapinlislki.

The 290 lb. female human gorilla had recently signed a multi-year contract with a professional wrestling organization and was in New York City for the official contract signing ceremony at Madison Square Garden. Post event/taping for the media, Gibby was escorted to her vehicle by several body guards. Tragically, that was the last anyone saw the world's tallest human ever alive. Gibby's vehicle immediately exploded into a raging inferno and she was instantly burned beyond recognition in a horrible tragic terroistic act.

Gibby Gilligans grand finale

Police immediately arrested Vladimirivov Lapinlislki who had a previous run-in with bulldyke Gibby Gilligan and her manager Bulldyke Gertrude. The Russian hot head and terrorist was apprehended in his dump on the skid row alley 13 blocks from Madison Sq. Garden. Police said Lapinlislki was stone drunk, laying on the floor of his rat infested dive and was completely incoherent at the time of arrest. The NYC Police Commander Igor Razapatowicz stated "we have no evidence whatsoever that Lapinlislki commited this tragic crime but, we wanted to arrest him. Anyway- that's the way we work in New York City". Vladimirivov Lapinlislki is locked up in the maximum security facility and bond has been set at 1 trillion dollars- a figure that even Osama bin Laden could not accumulate.

Police arrest terrorist

Wrestling Promoter Salvitore Saliva III told our reporter on the scene "this is the most devistating moment in the history of the squared circle. We have lost the most potentially lucrative and gifted athlete to ever enter the profession. We will be honoring the late Gibby Gillligan in a special ceremony next week and we will establish a bulldyke-bitch trust fund that our millions of rabid fans can contribute $1 each to- to stop these senceless acts of terrorism! I believe this is all the result of those islamic assholes over in Iraq. I'm going to call Bush and see if we can't drop a few hydrogen bombs on those mother fuckers over there". Saliva stopped his berserk outburst, foaming at the mouth, and left our reporter speechless and dumbfounded.

Gibby's manager and lover- Bulldyke Gertrude was not at the signing ceremony as she had to attend a bulldyke meeting in Palo Alto. The 400 lb. female bull therefore has not been informed of the tragic death of her lover. It is feared Gertrude will go balistic when she learns her lesbo lover is dead so the NYC Police have put out and all-points bulletin to arrest Gertrude on-sight. "We'll nip this in the bud", stated Commander Razapatowicz.

9/08

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